How to Keep Your Diet on Track

You’ve been dieting for a few months and have dropped some weight. You’re feeling pretty good about your progress and then—bam!—something gets in the way that threatens to land you back where you started. You’re not alone: I’ve counseled countless clients who assume they’ve mastered the art of healthy eating and then one day realize the number on the scale is sneaking up on them. When I take a closer look, I see that their problems tend to fit into one of five categories. Here’s what to watch out for and how to get back on track in no time.




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Diet Derailer #1: You’re Bored



In the beginning, dieting was kind of exciting. Yes, it was hard, but it was also an adventure—you got to think about food in a different way and try new recipes and meal plans. But once you did all that, the excitement probably died down. You figured out which foods fit into your plan, and you stuck with them. Is there anything wrong with oatmeal for breakfast, a turkey sandwich for lunch and grilled chicken for dinner? Absolutely not. But if you eat that almost every day, chances are you won’t feel satisfied, which means you may need a larger portion to feel full. Or, just to beat the boredom, you might start reverting to the old high-cal favorites that you “gave up” when you decided to lose weight.



To Stay on Course...



Eat seasonally. This is the best way to keep variety in your diet. Hit a farmers’ market (or even your supermarket) with an eye toward the newest produce. Sure, your old standbys (like apples and bananas) are great year-round, but spring asparagus or summer peaches can be much more satisfying.



Add spice. The right herbs and spices can take any meal from drab to delicious. Experiment with cilantro (great in a marinade for lean beef), fresh mint (try it in a multigrain pasta salad) and cumin (perfect with salmon). Or go ethnic with easy ingredients like a Moroccan spice blend or Asian chili sauce. For recipe ideas, go to WomansDay.com/LightRecipes.



Dab on condiments. A lowfat diet can seem low on flavor, so reintroduce smaller amounts of higher-fat items. Just a tablespoon of pesto, blue cheese, guacamole or roasted red pepper hummus is all you need to punch up a sandwich or main course.



Try breakfast for dinner and vice versa. There’s nothing that says you can’t have a veggie omelet for dinner or a few slices of turkey with some fresh, crunchy veggies for breakfast.



Experiment. Test a new recipe that incorporates a type of lean protein you don’t eat often, like scallops or ground lamb.



Diet Derailer #2: You’re a Little too Comfortable



You’ve dropped 5, 10 or even 20 pounds and you’re feeling really confident. So confident, in fact, that you start to think nothing can mess with your success. Before you know it, you’re again reaching for a second glass of wine or an extra serving of yourfavorite dish (even if it’s a healthy one). You start to treat yourself to dessert once a day instead of once a week. “I can handle it,” you tell yourself. “I’ll make up for it later!” Meanwhile, those little extras are creeping up, and before you know it, so has the scale.



To Stay on Course...



Go back to basics. It’s normal for the scale to fluctuate a bit, but if you see that you’re 2 or 3 pounds heavier several weeks in a row, step into action. Review the Get-Real Basics and think about what you were originally doing that you’re not anymore. Did you plan your meals for the week ahead of time, but now you’re just winging it? Have you stopped keeping a food diary? Go back to the strategies that initially helped you succeed.



Indulge mindfully. Whether you’re just starting to lose weight or nearing your goal, you deserve to enjoy good food. “There’s no reason to feel deprived, hungry or punished,” says Michelle May, MD, author of Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat. The key is to decide what you really want and eat it mindfully, which may mean deciding when a treat is really worth it. You want to finish something delicious and think, “Wow, that was worth every calorie,” not, “I feel gross— why did I eat that?”



Visualize your success. Keep a picture of you at your fittest on your refrigerator, computer or desk to remind you what you’re striving for or hoping to maintain. Or jot on a notecard a list of the pros and cons of resisting or giving in to your urges. “Keeping it handy—like in your wallet—gives you easy access and reminds you why it’s worth it to do the hard work,” says New York City–based psychologist Andrea Jewell, PsyD.



Diet Derailer #3: You’re Taking a Vacation—and So is Your Diet



There’s just something about vacation that makes us all want to indulge. But a week’s worth of highcal meals and snacks can do serious damage. Sometimes the problem is a practical one (say, you’re on the road or at an airport with nothing but fast food in sight). But often the biggest roadblock is mental: You’re away, you want to enjoy yourself and you don’t want to follow any rules—including diet ones.



To Stay on Course...



Be realistic. Aim to maintain your weight during this time rather than lose. If you can come back from your trip without any extra baggage, consider yourself in good shape.



Plan ahead. Pack snacks like nuts and all-natural granola bars so you’ve got something on hand for difficult situations (a delayed flight, going a long time without meals). Skipping a satisfying snack may lead to overeating at mealtimes. If your best attempts to travel prepared go awry, seek out easy, accessible options like trail mix, fresh fruit, lowfat yogurt, lowfat popcorn or whole-wheat pretzels, most of which you’ll find almost anywhere these days.



Indulge wisely. Decadent doesn’t always mean high-cal. Go ahead and order the lobster (just go easy on the butter sauce) or even the filet mignon (think 4 to 6 ounces, not 16 ounces). And yes, you can eat dessert— but remember that tasty things come in small packages! So if you’re going out for ice cream, skip the sundae and get one small scoop of your favorite flavor. And sharing a dessert is always a sweet way to finish a meal.

Aim for balance. Pick one meal or snack as a daily splurge; the rest of the time, eat as close to normal as possible.



Diet Derailer #4: Parties, Parties Everywhere



If your social calendar is constantly full of barbecues, weddings, baby and bridal showers, and more, you’re likely faced with multicourse meals, heavy hors d’oeuvres platters, caloric desserts, cocktails…you name it. All that temptation would throw anyone off a healthy weightloss routine.



To Stay on Course...



Consider the “specialness” of the event. Is this the only barbecue you’re going to all summer? Then have one hot dog with all the trimmings if that’s what you really want. But if you’ll be barbecuing every weekend, take that into account. Don’t use “But it’s a celebration!” as an excuse to overdo it.



Don’t hit a party with a growling stomach. Saving up all day for a big event by skipping meals may set you up to eat more than you bargained for. Keep your metabolism and hunger levels steady by having a small balanced meal or substantial healthy snack before the party. You’ll be much better equipped to navigate food options and keep tabs on portion sizes if you don’t arrive starving.



Do a lap. If you’re at a cocktail party or buffet, don’t dive into the spread immediately. Instead, take some time to scope out what’s available. Save about ¼ of your plate for the fun stuff, like cheese fondue, mini quiche or fried calamari. The rest of your plate is for lighter foods, like fresh crudités with a little dip, or mini grilled beef or chicken skewers.



Think bout what’s negotiable—and what’s not. If you’re going to a wedding, you’re probably going to have a glass of champagne and a slice of wedding cake. So what’s skippable? That bland roll at your place setting or your side of potatoes, which you could have any day of the week.



Diet Derailer #5: You’re Stressed



It’s a fact: Food makes us feel good. There’s just something about warm, gooey chocolate chip cookies or creamy chicken pot pie that takes us right back to a place of comfort and calm. That might not be a problem if one cookie did the trick, but for most of us the soothing powers of a food disappear as soon as we stop eating it, says Dr. May. So we end up eating another—and another—in an attempt to recapture that fleeting feeling. And if you’re stressed, you may gobble down food without paying attention to what or how much you’re eating. Research has also found that cortisol, a stress hormone, may prompt you to eat more, especially sweets.



To Stay on Course...



Take a breather. It may sound silly, but the next time you have an impulse to reach for food (but you’re not really hungry), take a deep breath. It will give you a chance to relax and realize that eating will not solve whatever you’re stressed about, says Dr. Jewell. Aside from deep breathing, there are plenty of other non-food things you can do to cope. Try taking a long walk with a friend, reading a book or giving yourself a manicure.



Try a soothing substitute. The next time you’re craving a certain food, think about what’s so appealing about its taste and/or texture. If it’s sweetness you desire, how about a mug of hot chocolate made with skim milk? If you want something creamy, would lowfat pudding work as well as a piece of cream pie? If you feel the need to chomp, would crunchy carrots and celery be (nearly) as good as chips? (Get more ideas at WomansDay.com/GetReal.)



Get some rest. People who are chronically sleep-deprived may feel hungrier and have a yearning for high-carb foods (which are a quick source of energy), says research in The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition. Aim for 7 to 9 hours of sleep per night.

How to Prevent Love Chub

By Jill Waldbieser for Women's Health Magazine


Falling in love can make you feel all soft and gooey inside. Unfortunately, it can have the same effect on your outside. Skip a workout here, order some greasy takeout there, and before you know it, you have more than just butterflies in your stomach—you've got a full-on jelly roll hanging over your waistband. Or as Lauren Conrad, former star of The Hills, put it: You've acquired the dreaded "boyfriend layer."




"When we get comfortable in a relationship, we establish new habits together that aren't always the best for our weight," says Amy Gorin, Ph.D., an assistant professor of psychology at the University of Connecticut. WH has identified five of the behaviors that can lead to a serious case of love chub. But don't worry—we've also included easy fixes.



YOU EAT OUT... ALL THE TIME



When you're single, you tend to prepare healthy foods at home. But once you're in a relationship, it's decadent dinner dates followed by caloric brunches. "Couples bond over food, and enjoying it becomes a special ritual in their relationship," says nutritionist Christine Avanti, author of Skinny Chicks Don't Eat Salads. That's bad news for your waistline: A Men's Health analysis of 24 national chains revealed that the average entree at a sit-down restaurant contains 867 calories. And that doesn't include apps, sides, and dessert.



Too much eating out? Are your friends a fat influence?



THE FIX: EAT IN. "Cooking together can be intimate," says Elizabeth Ward, R.D., a nutritionist in Boston. "Food is very sensual, especially when you take turns tasting it." Plus, of course, you can control the fat and calories by using healthy recipes and ingredients that are low in fat. When you do dine out, eat a healthy snack that contains protein and fiber a few hours before your meal. "Women often skimp all day when they're going out at night," Ward says. "But that leaves them so hungry that they end up overdoing it." Nonfat yogurt and a piece of fruit or a small bowl of cereal with lowfat milk are smart choices.



YOU'RE ALWAYS IN BED



Or on the couch. Or anywhere but the gym. A study last year in the journal Obesity found that couples who live together for two or more years are less likely to be physically active, and the women are more likely to become obese. "As positive as relationships can be, they also change your routine," says Martin Binks, Ph.D., director of Binks Behavioral Health. "You schedule more couple's events and have less time to yourself." Drinks with your new guy... or a date with the old treadmill? It's not exactly a tough choice.



Try the Better Sex Diet.



THE FIX: GET HIM INVOLVED. A study in the Archives of Internal Medicine found that women who exercised with a partner lost more weight than those who sweated solo. "When people do something together, they're more likely to stick with it," explains Karen Miller-Kovach, R.D., author of He Loses, She Loses. So sign up together for a 5-K, go for a bike ride instead of watching a movie, or join the same gym. When you don't feel like going, he'll drag you there, and you'll do the same for him.



YOU MATCH HIM BITE FOR BITE



It's tough to stick to petite portions when your dining companion downs 500 to 1,500 more calories a day than you do. "Women develop 'portion distortion,' " Ward says. "You don't recognize a normal-size serving anymore because you're always eating with a guy who consumes huge platefuls of food." He might be able to get away with it (guys have more muscle mass, so they require more calories), but shoveling in all those extra forkfuls will eventually catch up with you.



THE FIX: SERVE YOURSELF LESS. Eat about three-quarters of what he'seating. Sorry, but women burn 26 percent fewer calories than men do, soat that rate you'll just about break even, says clinical psychologistSusan Albers, Psy.D., author of 50 Ways to Soothe Yourself Without Food.



37 Yummy protein-packed meals for more weight loss.



HIS SNACKS ARE YOUR SNACKS You might not buy chips for yourself, but when he leaves the bag out on the coffee table, you need supreme willpower to ignore it. A study from Newcastle University's Human Nutrition Research Centre found that women were more likely to adopt their partner's eating habits than vice versa. "It's one way women connect with men," says Stacy Kaiser, a licensed psychotherapist based in Southern California.



THE FIX: KNOW YOUR OPTIONS. You have two diet-friendly choices: Serve yourself a small amount of his snack and put it on a plate (dipping your hand into the bag over and over again leads to diet disaster), or do what Ward suggests and have a portion-controlled, lower-calorie alternative on hand to munch while he takes down that bag of chips or pint of ice cream. Popchips (120 calories per serving, with just three servings in a big bag!) can satisfy your salt craving, while hockey-puck-size Skinny Cow ice cream sandwiches (140 calories) fill in nicely for fattening frozen treats. And they're so good, who knows, you may even convert him.



YOU'RE HAPPY



Research shows that what's good for your heart may be bad for your hips. A study published last year in the journal BioPsychoSocial Medicine found that happy people were less likely to succeed at losing weight than those with a "slightly negative and cautious outlook."



THE FIX: WEIGH IN OFTEN. It's great to accept your body and not obsess over every last calorie, but it's hard to feel good about yourself when none of your pants fit. To prevent your eating habits from spiraling out of control, Miller-Kovach recommends regular weigh-ins. "Studies have shown that once you pass the five-pound mark, weight gain can take off like a runaway train," she says. Seeing the scale creep toward that mark can be a call to action. Still need convincing? Women in a Duke University study who lost as little as 10 percent of their body weight reported dramatic improvements in the bedroom. "Research shows that people who are more active and happier with their bodies have more satisfying sex lives," Ward says. If that's not motivation, we don't know what is.

Traveling Safely as a Woman

In my classes, women often ask, "Is it safe for a woman to travel alone through Europe?" This is a question best answered by women. Europe Through the Back Door researcher Risa Laib wrote this chapter based on her solo experience and tips contributed from other travelers: Gail Morse, Peggy Roberts, Suzanne Hogsett, Bharti Kirchner, Kendra Roth, Gretchen Strauch, Ann Neel, and Heidi Sewell. Collectively, these women have more than a decade of solo travel experience in dozens of countries.

Note that many of these tips are equally useful for anyone traveling solo — male or female.

Every year, thousands of women, young and old, travel to Europe on their own. You're part of a grand group of adventurers. Traveling alone, you'll have the chance to make your own discoveries and the freedom to do what you like. It becomes habit-forming.

As a solo woman, you're more approachable than a couple or a solo man. You'll make friends from all over the world, and you'll have experiences that others can only envy. When you travel with a partner, you need to compromise, your focus narrows, and doors close. When you're on your own, you're open to the moment.

Your friends and family may try to talk you out of solo travel, worrying for your safety and regaling you with horror stories. Remind them — and yourself — that millions of women have traveled alone, and will continue to do so time and time again.

Solo travel is fun, challenging, vivid, and exhilarating. It's a gift from you to you. Prepared with good information and a positive attitude, you'll thrive in Europe. And you'll come home stronger and more confident than ever before. Here's how to make it happen.

Getting Inspired

Read exciting books written by solo women travelers about their experiences (try Dervla Murphy's outrageous adventures). For practical advice, read "how-to" travel guidebooks written by and for women (such as those listed in the sidebar at right).

Seek out other women travelers. Invite them out for dinner and pepper them with questions. Visit online forums for your destination and send email to other women for advice.

Take classes. A foreign-language course is ideal. Consider a class in European history, art history, or travel skills.

Keep up on international news so you can discuss local politics. Study a map of Europe — get to know your neighbors.

Pretend you're traveling alone before you ever leave America. Practice reaching out. Strike up conversations with people in the grocery line. Consciously become more adaptable. If it rains, marvel at the miracle.

Think hard about what you want to see and do. Create the vacation of your dreams.

Facing the Challenges

These are probably your biggest fears: vulnerability to theft, harassment, and loneliness. Take heart. You can tackle each of these concerns head-on. If you've traveled alone in America, you're more than prepared for Europe. In America, theft and harassment are especially scary because of their connection with assault. In Europe, you'll rarely, if ever, hear of violence. Theft is past tense (as in, "Where did my wallet go?"). As for experiencing harassment, you're far more likely to think, "I'm going to ditch this guy ASAP" than, "This guy is going to hurt me."

Loneliness is often the most common fear. But, remember, if you get lonely, you can do something about it.

For tips on women's health concerns and traveling while pregnant, see Women's Health on the Road.

Traveling Alone Without Feeling Lonely

Here are some tips on meeting people, eating out, and enjoying your evenings.

Meeting people: Stay in hostels and you'll have a built-in family (hostels are open to all ages). Or choose small pensions and B&Bs, where the owners have time to talk with you. At most tourist sites, you'll meet more people in an hour than you would at home in a day. If you're feeling shy, cameras are good icebreakers; offer to take someone's picture with their camera.

Take your laundry and a deck of cards to a launderette and turn solitaire into gin rummy. You'll end up with a stack of clean clothes and conversations.

If traveling with an MP3 player (such as an iPod), bring along a Y-jack and a second set of headphones to share your music.

Take a walking tour of a city (ask at the tourist information office). You'll learn about the town and meet other travelers, too. If you're staying in a hostel, check their boards — some also arrange tours.

It's easy to meet people on buses and trains. You're always welcome at a church service; stay for the coffee hour. When you meet locals who speak English, find out what they think — about anything.

Play with kids. Learn how to say "pretty baby" in the native language. If you play peek-a-boo with a baby or fold an origami bird for a kid, you'll make friends with the parents as well as the children.

Try pairing up with another solo traveler. Stay for a while in a small town or return to a city you enjoyed. The locals will remember you, you'll know the neighborhood, and it'll feel like home.

Eating out: Consider quick and cheap alternatives to formal dining. Try a self-service café, a local-style fast-food restaurant, or a small ethnic eatery. Visit a supermarket deli and get a picnic to eat in the square or a park (families often frequent parks). Get a slice of pizza from a take-out shop and munch it as you walk along, people-watching and window-shopping. Eat in the members' kitchen of a hostel; you'll always have companions. Make it a potluck.

A restaurant feels cheerier at noon than at night. If you like company, eat in places so crowded and popular that you have to share a table or ask other single travelers if they'd like to join you. Assume that many couples would enjoy a third party at their dinner table to stoke the conversation.

If you eat alone, be busy. Use the time to learn more of the language. Practice your verbal skills with the waiter or waitress (when I asked a French waiter if he had kids, he proudly showed me a picture of his twin girls). Read a guidebook, a novel, or the International Herald Tribune. Do trip-planning, draw in your journal, or scrawl a few postcards to the folks back home.

An afternoon at a café is a great way to get some writing done; for the cost of a beverage and a snack, you'll be granted more peace and privacy than at a public fountain or other open space.

Most countries have a type of dish or restaurant that's fun to experience with a group. When you run into tourists during the day, make plans for dinner. Invite them to join you for, say, a rijsttafel dinner in the Netherlands, a smörgåsbord in Scandinavia, a fondue in Switzerland, a paella feast in Spain, or a spaghetti feed in an Italian trattoria.

At night: Experience the magic of European cities at night. Go for a walk along well-lit streets. With gelato in hand, enjoy the parade of people, busy shops, and illuminated monuments. Night or day, you're invariably safe when lots of people are around. Take advantage of the wealth of evening entertainment: concerts, movies, puppet shows, and folk dancing. Some cities offer tours after dark. You can see Paris by night on a river cruise.

During the evening, visit an Internet café. Send travel news to your friends and family. You'll find friendly answers in your inbox the next time you have the opportunity to get online.

If you like to stay in at night, get a room with a balcony overlooking a square. You'll have a front-row seat to the best show in town. An MP3 player loaded with familiar tunes can also help cheer you. Call home, a friend, your family. With cheap international phone cards, it's actually inexpensive. Read novels set in the country you're visiting. Learn to treasure solitude. Go early to bed, be early to rise. Shop at a lively morning market for fresh rolls and join the locals for coffee.

Protecting Yourself from Theft

As a woman, you're often perceived as being more vulnerable to theft than a man. Here are some tips to help keep you safe.

Carry a daypack instead of a purse. Leave expensive-looking jewelry at home. Keep your valuables in your money belt and tuck your wallet (containing only a day's worth of cash) in your front pocket. Keep your camera zipped up in your daypack. In crowded places (buses, subways, street markets), carry your daypack over your chest or firmly under one arm. Ask at your hotel or the tourist office if there's a neighborhood you should avoid, and mark it on your map.

Avoid tempting people into theft. Make sure valuables in your hotel room are kept out of sight. Wear your money belt when you sleep in hostels. When you're sightseeing, never set down anything of value (such as a camera, wallet, or railpass). Either hold it in your hand or keep it zipped away. If you're sitting down to rest, eat, or check your email, loop a strap of your daypack around your arm, leg, or chair leg. Remember, you're unlikely ever to be hurt by thieves. They want to separate you from your valuables efficiently and painlessly, without alerting you.

Dealing with Men

In small European towns, men are often more likely to speak English than women. If you never talk to men, you could miss out on a chance to learn about the country. So, by all means, talk to men. Just choose the men and choose the setting.

In northern Europe, you won't draw any more attention from men than you do in America. In southern Europe, particularly in Italy, you'll get more attention than you're used to, but it's usually in the form of the "long look" — nothing you can't handle.

Be aware of cultural differences. In the Mediterranean world, when you smile and look a man in the eyes, it's often considered an invitation. Wear dark sunglasses and you can stare all you want.

Dress modestly to minimize attention from men. Take your cue from what the local women wear. In Italy, slacks and skirts (even short ones) are considered more proper than shorts.

Wear a real or fake wedding ring and carry a picture of a real or fake husband. There's no need to tell men that you're traveling alone, or whether you're actually married or single. Lie unhesitatingly. You're traveling with your husband. He's waiting for you at the hotel. He's a professional wrestler who retired from the sport for psychological reasons.

If you'd like to date a guy, meet him at a public place. Tell him you're staying at a hostel — you have a 10 p.m. curfew and 29 roommates. Better yet, bring a couple of your roommates along to meet him. After the introductions, let everyone know where you're going and when you'll return.

Handling Harassment

The way you handle harassment at home works in Europe, too.

In southern Europe, men may think that if you're alone, you're available. Keep your stride confident and look away from men trying to attract your attention. If a man comes too close to you, say "no" firmly in the local language. That's usually all it takes. Tell a slow learner that you want to be alone. Then ignore him. (Some women pretend they don't understand English by shrugging and mumbling a phrase in another language.)

If he's obnoxious, solicit the help of others. Ask people at a café or on the beach if you can join them for a while.

If he's well-meaning but too persistent, talk openly to him. Turn him into an ally. If he's a northern Italian, ask him about southern Italian men. Get advice from him on how you can avoid harassment when you travel farther south. After you elicit his "help," he'll be more like a brother than a bother to you.

Usually men are just seeing if you're interested. Only a few are difficult. If a man makes a lewd gesture, look away and leave the scene. Harassers don't want public attention drawn to their behavior. I went out for a walk in Madrid one evening, and a man came up much too close to me, scaring me. I shouted, "Get!" And he was gone. I think I scared him as much as he scared me. Ask a local woman for just the right thing to say to embarrass jerks. Learn how to say it, loudly. (The Rick Steves Phrase Books have a whole section on phrases handy for women.)

If you feel like you're being followed, trust your instincts. Don't worry about overreacting or seeming foolish. Forget ladylike behavior — start screaming and acting crazy if the situation warrants it. Or head to the nearest hotel and chat up the person behind the desk until your would-be admirer moves on. Ask the hotelier to call you a cab to take you to your own hotel, hostel, or B&B.

If you feel the need to carry mace, take a self-defense class instead. Mace will be confiscated at the airport, but knowledge and confidence are yours to keep. And, remember, the best self-defense is common sense.

Traveling Smart

Create conditions that are likely to turn out in your favor. By following these tips, you'll have a safer, smoother, more enjoyable trip.

Be self-reliant so that you don't need to depend on anybody unless you want to. Always carry cash, food, water, a map, a guidebook, and a phrase book. When you need help, ask another woman or a family.

When you use cash machines, withdraw cash during the day on a busy street, not at night when it's dark with too few people around.

Walk purposefully with your head up. Look like you know where you're going. Use landmarks (such as church steeples) to navigate. If you get lost in an unfriendly neighborhood, go into a restaurant or store to ask for directions or to study your map.

Learn enough of the language to get by. With a few hours' work you'll know more than most tourists and be better prepared to deal with whatever situation arises. At a bus station in Turkey, I witnessed a female tourist repeatedly asking in English, louder and louder, "When does the bus leave?" The frustrated ticket clerk kept answering her in Turkish, "Now, now, now!" If you know even just a little of the language, you'll make it much easier on yourself and those around you.

Before you leave a city, consider visiting the train or bus station you're going to leave from, so you'll know where it is, how long it takes to reach it, and what services it has. Note if the station seems clean, well-lit, and safe. Reconfirm your departure time.

Skip hitchhiking. But if you absolutely have to hitch, choose people to ask, instead of being chosen. Try your luck at a gas station, restaurant, on a ferry, or in the parking lot of a tourist attraction. Ideally, pair up with another traveler.

When taking the train, avoid staying in empty compartments, especially at night. Rent a couchette for overnight trains. For about $30, you'll stay with like-minded roommates in a compartment you can lock, in a car monitored by an attendant. You'll wake reasonably rested with your belongings intact.

It's possible to ask for a female roommate on overnight trains. (You'll have better luck if the train isn't crowded.) Some countries, such as Spain, are better about accommodating these requests than others. In France, a one-bed compartment closest to the conductor is set aside for women, but it's the most expensive type of accommodation. In general, ask what the options are, make the request to bunk with other women, and hope for the best — but don't count on it.

If you're departing late at night and the bus or train station is sketchy, ask your B&B owner if you can hang out in their breakfast room — generally untouched in the evening — until you need to leave for the station. Cafés, including busy Internet cafés, which are often open late, can also be a better spot to kill time than the train station waiting room. (If you arrive at a train station you'll later be departing from, note if the station seems clean, well-lit, and safe.)

If you're not fluent in the language, accept the fact that you won't always know what's going on. There's a reason why the Greek bus driver drops you off in the middle of nowhere. It's a transfer point, and another bus will come along in a few minutes. You'll often discover that the locals are looking out for you.

The same good judgment you use at home applies to Europe. Start out cautious and figure out as you travel what feels safe to you.

Treat yourself right — get enough rest, healthy food, and exercise. Walking is a great way to combine exercise and sightseeing. I've jogged alone in cities and parks throughout Europe without any problems. If a neighborhood looks seedy, head off in another direction.

Relax. There are other trains, other buses, other cities, other people. If one thing doesn't work out, something else will. Thrive on optimism. Have a grand adventure!